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About Varied / Professional Official Beta Tester Guy Robert Vestal51/Male/United States Groups :iconold-school-hipsters: Old-School-Hipsters
 
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Deviant for 4 Years
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Critiques


This image was part of a vote the artist had setup, to choose an image for his 1000 word description of the image. For some reason, I f...


Vision: 4 Stars.......... Because of the unique nature of this review including music, we have to forgo the usual format for critiquing...


Greetings... I want everyone to take note, this is one of the rarest events that can happen here, so pay close attention to this critiq...


So... This started off as me blowing it off because of a gut wrenching watermark, you know the one, the dA "in the middle fuck you, you...


From the artist: ________________________ "I'm gonna fly like a bird through the night, feel my tears as they dry I'm gonna swing from ...

NOTE: I do not do requests. I find you, and if you are new to me, I will usually ask you... "Was there something specific you were hoping to get from a critique?" Your answer dictates what happens from there. Most folks answer this question without checking my profile first, and thus 99 out of 100 times I ask, I get what I call a "ham pressed against the glass" answer, that appears to be nothing more than an unenthusiastic "meh", showing no real interest in a critique.

Critique 101

Vision and Impact are “Sister Scores” because they (being women/emotional) are the most powerful, and have the most effect on the viewer.

Originality and Technique are the “brother scores” (being men/logical) because they are the learning/work ethic variables.

So what is it exactly that I do, what and why is my bougie and pretentious old school hipster assessment of the artwork of others? What could possibly be more narcissistic, other than being the bougie and pretentious gallery owner that hypes the "latest", to the bougie and pretentious buyers? And don't those peddlers sometimes look for clowns like me to validate their "product"? So where in the hell do I get my nerve from?

From the artists themselves actually! If they tell me I am an idiot, I suck, and I have absolutely no idea what in the hell I am talking about, then I am indeed in trouble. So doesn't that leave me open to be shot down if the artist doesn't like what I have to say? No, because if you are there FOR the artist, there is no way the artist is going to fight you. If you are there FOR YOURSELF, then ya, you can expect to be told to shove your opinion "in the out hole", and sideways in the process. The soulless critic that touts crap to be "peddled" to the upper class Caucasian elitists is there for himself. The fools like me that few listen to, are actually wanted to be heard from by the artists, for reasons other than monetary.

So what is it exactly that needs to be done, what are the artists looking for? It must be something if they are premium members, and setting the deviation to be formally critiqued.

The bottom line is the truth; don't just give them 5 stars, and bunch of praise, because that is a waste of the artist's time. If you want to gush, then that is what the comments are for, suck up and brown nose in the comments.

Guidelines for choosing what to critique:
  • Do you like anything about it? NEVER critique something that you DO NOT LIKE! If it sucks, then move on; don't waste your time with something you don't even have a liking for.
  • Could the artist had done something differently that could have made you like it even more? If not, then pass it by, there is no such thing as 5 star perfection, and in those rare instances it is, you will be looking for something to disrupt the skewed view you obviously have of it.
  • Would you own or display this piece in your own home, either as-is, or after the artist heeded your suggestions?

What to do when critiquing:
  • Always tell the truth, even if you think it will offend. If you are making a hamburger, and it tastes like dog poop, don't you want those eating it to say something? Don't you want those eating it to tell you what in the hell you are doing wrong? Of course you do! So does the artist, the artist wants to know what you think, what YOU FEEL.
  • NEVER tell them what is WRONG, who the hell are you to decide what is right or wrong? Tell them what you think would have made you like it more. You like it now, but you would like it even more if they had…. And had…. And maybe….
  • If you keep yourself at the level of "subordinate" to the artist, the artist will place themselves at the level of subordinate to you. Humility begets humility. Arrogance begets arrogance. You go in there like pissy pete, and decide that this hack better heed your grandiose wisdom, the you're going to get shot down in a heartbeat, and more than likely find yourself embarrassed.
  • Be DETAILED! Don't just tell them what you like, go into exact details, point things out. If you just say "I Like…", then you appear to have simply "looked at" the piece, and not absorbed and digested the piece. If you can't go into detail about your opinion, then keep your one-liners to yourself.

The critique follows 4 levels of ranking (stars):
  • Vision: What do you see when you look at it? What do you think the artist sees when they look at? What do you think the artist saw in their mind prior to creation of the piece? Is what you see clear or hard to describe? Is what the artist saw clear or hard to describe? Is it good or bad that you can or cannot see what the artist saw, or can or cannot understand what you see? Do you see only one thing? Do you see many things? Is that good or bad? Tell the artist what you do or don't see. Can you smell anything in your mind; can you hear sounds in your mind, can you feel heat, feel cold?
  • Originality: Is this the first time you have ever seen something like this, or have you seen this a zillion times? Is it good or bad that you have or haven't seen it a little or a lot? If this is not an original idea, is it in any way unique, where all the other dime-a-dozen ideas were the same? Did the artist find something within the idea that others did not? Anybody can make a hamburger with enough practice, but making it different and better than others is much, much harder.
  • Technique: Were they good at what they did? Were things where they belonged? Were they put together in the proper order? Were their things that could have been done better with different mechanics, or different environment, or different timing, or different materials, or different usage of the materials? Be detailed, give them your perspective on theirs because technique is something learned, and thus the easiest to improve upon, not like the last ranking…
  • Impact: It is here that all the learning in the world cannot make an artist better; it is here that the artist is naked and vulnerable. It is here that their idea of control over the piece depends entirely on the viewer. How does this piece make you feel? Can you "get into it"? Does it make you think? Tell the artist the emotions it evokes, tell the artist what happens when you engage the piece, does it engage you, or do you engage it? Did you stare at this a while? Did you look at it several times, and see something different every time? That is how you know if it engages, if it causes you to be a part of it, if it causes you to keep looking, to keep searching, to keep thinking, to keep feeling.

No matter what, praise the artist, give the artist credit where credit is due, even if there were things you would like to have seen done differently, always be sure to give them both good and bad, never just one and not the other. Balance is the key, light and dark, hot and cold, high and low.

** On watermarks… I personally find them to be a symbol of Hubris & Avarice on the part of the hack that uses them; I give respect ONLY to the "Artist" that "Signs" their work, in the historically accepted way. Now that is just me, you yourself need to come to terms with how they affect you. Does the watermark block the view? Does it hurt the impact? Does it cloud the vision? Does it hide the technique? The ARTIST will always want to know. The HACK will only care about their work being stolen, and someone else "taking credit" or "turning a buck" they could have turned.

(** And yes, folks WILL HATE on me for saying what I just said, but oh well. The artists that I know, I know their work. If someone clips it, and I find it elsewhere, I can tell the difference, how? That is where the "IMPACT" comes into play. ONLY the artist can do what the artist does to me, and if that name does not match up, I will know. In the public monitored "art world" where money matters, the critic is the most dangerous enemy to the plagiarist, they cannot get away with it when folks that know that artist stumble into it.)
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OldSchoolHipster's Profile Picture
OldSchoolHipster
Guy Robert Vestal
Artist | Professional | Varied
United States
Counter-Culture Art Critic

I am a single Father of 8 Daughters, with 4 of them still at home in eastern Nebraska. They are all "Artists".

♫♫♫ I myself am an old school hair metal musician from West Hollywood, CA in the 80's that turned DJ, then became a Father, and have been out of music for 25+ years. I am now returning to music production, as well as fashion design and writing...♫♫♫




My Goodreads Critique/Review Account
Interests
  • Listening to: Spotify
  • Reading: Etsy Website
  • Eating: Oreos
  • Drinking: Ice Water
A GoFundMe page  that a very close church friend built for me, so that I can attempt to go back to work, at my old metalsmith trade.

The problem has been finding folks to share the page on their facebook feed, twitter, all that jazz. LOL

Do the criticisms of others about your art matter to you? 

79%
86 deviants said Yes
21%
23 deviants said No

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER

ATTENTION!!!:

If you are a paranoid teenage narcissist who thinks far too highly of themselves, and the whole world MUST be creeping on you because you are all that. Please block me now so that I don’t have to be further nauseated by your immature delusions.

Also, if you are an STD ridden porn whore, who got offended over my question(s) about your skeevy gallery of un-bathed, greasy, skank shots... Then yes, I blocked you as well.

Thanks in advance to both genres of losers!
:-)

Comments


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:iconluckynumber113:
LuckyNumber113 Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the re-watch, Guy! :hug:
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(1 Reply)
:icontigerrose1329:
TigerRose1329 Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks again for adding me to your collection!
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:iconteslarossa:
Teslarossa Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016
Happy birthday!
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(1 Reply)
:iconlunelapin:
LuneLapin Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy birthday!
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(1 Reply)
:iconkiradaidohji:
kiraDaidohji Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Happy Birthday XD!! Have your cake and eat it too 
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(1 Reply)
:iconskunkygirlyta:
skunkygirlyta Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016  Student Writer
happy birthday
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(1 Reply)
:iconchicath:
ChicaTH Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016  Student General Artist
Happy birthday!
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(1 Reply)
:iconmalintra-shadowmoon:
Malintra-Shadowmoon Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy Birthday :heart:
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(1 Reply)
:iconengleheart:
Engleheart Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2016  Student Artist
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!Super Fantastic Golden Platter Cake 3D Super Fantastic Golden Platter Cake 3D Fun cake Fun cake birthday cake birthday cake cake cake Cupcake GIF Icon - Five Nights at Freddy's Cupcake GIF Icon - Five Nights at Freddy's happy DA B-day :3 happy DA B-day :3 Birthday cake  icon Birthday cake  icon KimRaiFan's Bday Cake KimRaiFan's Bday Cake Cake for Shifteh Cake for Shifteh Let them jump out of cake Let them jump out of cake Free Avatar - CupTardCake Free Avatar - CupTardCake Rolos and Emote Rolos and Emote Cake Cake cookie cookie cake love cake love Food Emoji-02 (Short Cake) Food Emoji-02 (Short Cake) Food Emoji-03 (Mini Cake) Food Emoji-03 (Mini Cake) cupcake cupcake Pixel Cake Pixel Cake Cute pudding x3 Cute pudding x3 Birthday cake Birthday cake Icon Free Cake Icon Free Cake keeki keeki :cakela: :cakela: Fromage Connoisseur fella (Badges) Fromage Connoisseur fella (Badges) Happy Birthday Cake Happy Birthday Cake Happy Birthday, Synfull Happy Birthday, Synfull Happy Birthday Rei Happy Birthday Rei Birthday Cake Birthday Cake vanilla cake vanilla cake cake icon cake icon Yummy cake Yummy cake
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(1 Reply)
:iconmalort57:
Malort57 Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2016  Professional General Artist
Happy birthday! MAKE IT BIG!
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(1 Reply)
:icontigerrose1329:
TigerRose1329 Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the cake and llama!  I shall cherish them forever :)
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(1 Reply)
:icontigerrose1329:
TigerRose1329 Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks again for including me in your collection!
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(1 Reply)
:icontigerrose1329:
TigerRose1329 Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for adding my poem to your collection!  I hope you feel better soon!
Reply
:icontigerrose1329:
TigerRose1329 Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks again for adding me to your collection!

Did you all have a fun Halloween?
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconyama-dharma:
yama-dharma Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2015  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for support! :) Glad you liked it!
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:icontigerrose1329:
TigerRose1329 Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for adding my Phinny drawing to your collection! :)
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(1 Reply)
:iconforever-just-jess:
forever-just-jess Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2015  Student Photographer
thank you again. it means a lot that you continue to support me.
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(1 Reply)
:iconiceicet:
iceicet Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015
Happy birthday!
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(1 Reply)
:iconxiangaswipper96:
XiangaSwipper96 Featured By Owner Edited Aug 27, 2015  Student Digital Artist
Happy B-Day to you!! Birthday cake  icon Sini Birthday  Five Nights at Freddy's 2 - Sexy Chica - Icon GIF Cupcake GIF Icon - Five Nights at Freddy'sbirthday cake happy DA B-day :3 fella's Gobbler (Party) MenInASuitcase KimRaiFan's Bday Cake fella Gift (Party) Hide Birthday Emote Lily Wishing a Happy Birthday 

Have a wonderful special day!! ^w^/
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(1 Reply)
:iconbloodbendingmaster97:
bloodbendingmaster97 Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconballoonsplz::iconaqua-hplz::iconaqua-aplz::iconaqua-pplz::iconaqua-pplz::iconaqua-yplz:
:iconaqua-bplz::iconaqua-iplz::iconaqua-rplz::iconaqua-tplz::iconaqua-hplz::iconaqua-dplz::iconaqua-aplz::iconaqua-yplz::iconexclamationmark2plz::iconexclamationmark2plz::iconballoonsplz2::iconballoonplz::icongiftplz::iconcakechocplz:
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(1 Reply)
:iconarianamoya:
ArianaMoya Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015
:cake::party:~Hello! ♥  Happy Birthday! :cake::party:
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(1 Reply)
:iconanimekidhanamakusa:
Animekidhanamakusa Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy birthday!
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(1 Reply)
:iconxxlest5000xx:
XxLest5000xX Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015   Photographer
HAPPY B DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
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(1 Reply)
:iconephemerii:
ephemerii Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy Birthday!
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(1 Reply)
:iconthemajesticbutter394:
TheMajesticButter394 Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Happy birthday!
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(1 Reply)
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